C h a z z W r i t e s . c o m

See all my books at AllThatChazz.com.

Ebook’s coming soon! But first, the Sex, Death & Mind Control (for fun and profit) coffee cup

Can't believe I can't flip this photo. Use your Ironman decoder ring!

Cover art by Kit Foster at http://www.kitfosterdesign.com…you know…when it’s flipped around correctly. (The camera turned it around.)

Formatting the Self-help for Stoners paper book today for ARCs.

Using the CreateSpace template. It’s a little tedious but certainly easy! Getting there!

Please check out my new essay on luck, career choices and self-publishing at allthatchazz.com.

Filed under: Books, Publicity & Promotion, What about Chazz?

The downside of cheap ebooks

The_Dangerous_KindEbooks are often so inexpensive that they have become impulse buys available for mere couch change. (That’s how I’m selling my ebooks. Two of them will be up for sale November 1 at $2.99 and one long

Self-help for Stoners

Available Nov. 1

short story goes for 99 cents.) It should be an easy sell for people who can read, like to read and actually do read. The Dangerous Kind, the short story, should lead people to buy the collections (Self-help for Stoners, Stuff to Read When You’re High and Sex, Death & Mind Control.) Well…it’s a good theory.

But will my work actually be read by anyone even after it’s bought?

Everybody’s to-read pile is so big!

Go to Goodreads and surf a bit and you’ll soon find a bunch of books that catch your eye, each one calling with equal force, “Add me to your to-read list!” I’ve recently become more active on Goodreads. I love the site and, after reading some personal recommendations from my GR friends, I’ve even reconsidered a couple of books I picked up and put back down at the bookstore.

An arresting cover can get surfers to slow down to gawk.

Killer ad copy helps.

Friendly, happy reviews help most.

Sex_Death_&_Mind_ControlBut if people buy it but don’t read it and then recommend it enthusiastically…

Let’s just say I can’t bear to think about that possibility very hard.

Filed under: DIY, e-reader, ebooks, My fiction, Publicity & Promotion, What about Chazz?, , , , , ,

On judging books by their covers

Thank you to everyone for your input on the covers for my book, Self-help for Stoners, Stuff to Read When You’re High (available on all e-readers Nov. 1, cha-cha-cha!)

The input has been put in. By a huge majority, the votes are for the bright orange cover (below). When it’s on a shelf, digital or wooden, it will stand out. It was an interesting experiment to see how people reacted to the covers. The happy thing is that, even among people who weren’t so sure about the orange cover, most of them still thought that cover could be effective. The other aspect about book cover colors is a little more inside baseball: The rule of thumb is that, unless it’s a golf or gardening book, green covers don’t sell very well.  (It’s one of those weird little details I learned from the Banff Publishing Workshop. It was reinforced by years of selling books for multiple publishers. I’m not sure about much, but that tidbit is pretty consistent except for The Celestine Prophecy.) 

Soon you’ll be hearing from my graphic designer, Kit Foster of www.kitfosterdesign.com. Kit’s a novelist, too, and very talented. Someone told me the other day how impressed he was with Kit’s covers. They do look like they’re from a large publishing house, not my tiny kingdom of Ex Parte Press. We’re all told we shouldn’t judge a book by its cover, but we all do. Without a solid cover, no one will pick it up or click on it to discover the tasty treats inside.

The process of working with a graphic designer: When Kit and I started a dialogue about book covers, the arrangement evolved organically. I described what I had in mind and sent him a sample of the manuscript. He suggested a few things and I saw his wisdom and asked for some tweaks. He sent me a cover and we narrowed it down with another round or two or three of tweaks. His input was invaluable. I have no idea how he does what he does and I bowed to his experience with graphics. Even though I have a deep background in selling books, my focus was the words. Kit came up with the images to sell the words. With Sex, Drugs & Romeo, the final graphic is very close to his original proposal. With Sex, Death and Mind Control (for fun and profit), we went back and forth a bit more, but Kit was always patient and helpful. The only element I knew I wanted to keep was the author tag. I wanted it to be consistent across the bottom in cherry red on all the covers so my books would be instantly identifiable for cross-promotion purposes.

Kit’s great at what he does and a photographer friend of mine is also awesome. I’m going to ask them to guest post and drop some science on us about the art of book cover creation. In the meantime, rethink your green cover and ask for a poll from your network of writer friends and readers. People will often help if you dare to ask.

Filed under: Books, ebooks, self-publishing, What about Chazz?, , , , , , , , , , , ,

And now for something somewhat different: allthatchazz.com

www.allthatchazz.com

Over a year and a half and 600 plus blog posts, Chazz Writes has been (and will continue to be) free content for writers about the craft and business of writing. Chazz Writes is about grammar, editing, writing advice and the latest self-publishing news. I’ve made a lot of friends and allies and promoted quite a few authors here. It’s a lot of fun. The fun will continue for readers on the companion site. Stop by, subscribe and see what’s cooking.

Someone is already offended because it looks like I’m saying writers aren’t readers. Some people arrive pre-offended, so…can you hear my shrug from there? As a writer, I’m also a power reader: vast library, ten books at a time, two e-readers…the whole smear. But not all readers are writers.  

What will be different? All that Chazz focuses on what readers want: reviews, sneak peeks and more ideas on what to read. On the new site, I write about reading.

Contributors: All That Chazz is open to submissions (just like Chazz Writes). If you’d like to write a guest post about who, what, when, why, where and how you’re reading, please submit your 300-word (max) post and a 25-word bio to me at expartepress@gmail.com.

The Book Review Circle: I haven’t forgotten about Kim Nayyer’s excellent suggestion to establish a book circle. (See the bottom segment for my personal update on what I’ve been doing instead.)

The Review Circle Recap: In the summer, I put out the call for self-published authors who were willing to review a book in exchange for a review of their own book. The reviews, to be published at All that Chazz and promoted on Chazz Writes, can be used by the author and the reviewer for their own blogs and whatever marketing purposes suit them. In the next couple of weeks (as the hither and dither allows) I’ll be contacting all the authors who contacted me to set up the circle.

If you want to participate in the review circle, email me with details of your book, genre and word count at expartepress@gmail.com.

(Don’t wait!)

This looks like a job for me: Wow, have I been busy! My business plan is coming together, though I wish I had a couple of interns and a cappuccino machine to hurry the publishing process along. So much of what I’m working on is new to me (formatting and podcasting, for instance). Some of the learning curve is so steep, I need two Sherpa guides. However, it’s coming together on schedule as long as I continue to try do everything at once. Self-publishing is not, as some claim, the “easy” road to publication. It’s just another path and the terrain is a little different.

I’m enjoying the view from this little goat path. I think I’ll climb higher and see what I can see.

Join me.

Filed under: All That Chazz, book reviews, DIY, e-reader, ebooks, getting it done, publishing, readers, reviews, self-publishing, What about Chazz?, , , , , , , , ,

A question for you: Which ebook cover is better?

Kit Foster, a fabulous graphic artist, is kicking around some ideas for the cover of my ebooks (releasing very, scarily soon.)

Which cover do you think is better, orange or green? You can leave a comment or email me at expartepress@gmail.com. Thanks! I appreciate your input.

Self-Help for Stoners Self Help for Stoners

Filed under: Books, ebooks, What about Chazz?,

A question for you

Today I noticed that somebody found my blog by googling “Cheryll Ladd’s nipples”, “Charlie’s Angles” and, more mysterious, “Cheryll Ladd and jim nipples.”

Um…what?! Gee, I hope that’s one guy and not several people arriving here from those searches.

So I’m curious:

How did you come to Chazz Writes…or how do you know me or what brought you here today?

Filed under: What about Chazz?, , , , , ,

Write believable characters

I’ve been on Walkabout. After crawling through the seedy underbelly of a big city, I feel dubious about the idea that there are unbelievable characters. There are so many strange people walking around, we shouldn’t be so dubious when they turn up in fiction.

Just this morning I saw:

1. A guy dressed up like a Bollywood character in a flashy musical. Same big goofy smile, too.

2. A handsome man, dressed in a sharp black suit and sporting a $200 haircut, looked like he belonged at the airport picking up cocaine from Columbia.

3. An impossibly sexy woman walked by. It’s Stella, long before she lost her groove! With asthma.

4. A very muscled young athlete strutted by. He’s had a great summer. The pancreatic cancer has already taken root.

5. Homeless people of all ages. They all have that same haunted look around the eyes. Their postures show that boredom is terribly heavy. I did not expect the dirty, skinny Santa to pull out an iPhone 4, however.

The trick, of course, is to provide enough character detail that your fictional actors have a believable context. Strange characters need a lot of reality around them to find the sweet spot on narrative’s balance beam. Let your mob goon have a soft spot for kids. Let the sweet grandmother swear when she doesn’t think anyone can hear. Don’t allow cardboard stand-ups and clichés in lieu of character development. Characters can be weird. Really weird. You can even clump them together since freaks often do gravitate to freaks. I’ve noticed Goth kids with parrot haircuts often do travel together, for instance.

Just avoid making them one-dimensional. For instance, one of my novels has a couple of gay characters. Ever notice how gay characters are often safely relegated to the flamboyant dancer who’s good with make-up or the safe gay neighbour who’s just a stand-in exposition device? In my novel, compared to the protagonist, the gay guys are proactive in how they deal with plot obstacles. By that I mean, they have skull-cracking ability and they are not just sitting around articulating plot details with pie charts. They have their own backstory and you’ll find yourself curious to follow them out the door to see what happens to them after the novel is over. (At least I’m curious.)

I plan a series. In the first book we meet Romeo, a young New Yorker who wants to be a movie star and becomes a murderer’s target. The next in the series will follow Romeo’s estranged mother as she tries to track her son down on his journey to Hollywood. The third book will be Romeo in Hollywood and once again in mortal danger. Things will get strange but will feel real.

Verisimilitude is easy because reality is scary weird. 

Look at the news. 

Filed under: self-publishing, Useful writing links, What about Chazz?, Writers, writing tips, , , , , , , , , , , ,

Ponderables

1. Even when I don’t want to work, there’s always a little something I can do while listening to podcasts that still makes me feel like I’m edging forward. But underneath that? It really feels like I’m fooling myself.

2. I feel most energized about eating well right after I’ve eaten something I  shouldn’t have. Clearly this is stupid. And repeated often. Why am I repeating behaviour I know hurts me and may kill me? Common doesn’t make it any less crazy.

3. Watching the news, this seems like a good time for bad ideas. From flirting with default to stock market plunges to riots in Britain. It’s like a vortex of Bad has opened and started spewing. It’s sucking energy from the Good vortex.

4. In university I sank to my enemy’s level. I had a very bad professor in Journalism school who was a real sphincter. In retaliation, I too, was an asshole. And I still don’t see any reasonable alternatives after all these years. Still!

5. A teenager I knew years ago was a tremendous singing talent. I was sure he’d be famous someday. I checked. He’s not. In fact, he disappeared. I know he didn’t get picked up by a record company because he was almost as fat as he was talented. He should be a household name, a millionaire, a success. I hope he’s the best something else he can be. But how many of us are destined for one pinnacle and reach our zenith elsewhere?

Filed under: publishing, What about Chazz?, , ,

Truman Syndrome & the writerly mindset

While sipping the best coffee ever at Coffee Culture, I saw a handsome, young black man standing across the street. Beside him sat an elderly white woman in a wheelchair.

I swear this is true: I watched him light a very fat joint, take a hit and pass it to the old woman. Without looking at him, she took a hit and passed it back. This wasn’t merely unexpected. It was surreal. As he rolled her out of sight I thought there was a story there but I wasn’t sure yet what it would be.

As I headed home, I had a Truman Syndrome moment. Everything looked slightly fake, like I was on a movie set made just for me. An old man with a nose like The Penguin’s beak and horrible posture scrabbled across the sidewalk as if pulled along by his cartoonish nose. At the same time, a woman ran the other way in a gait that looked…contrived. She wore a pastel green blouse that matched her socks and she ran like she was holding back a terrible case of diarrhea and trying to hop in time to an urgent nursery rhyme.

If I were to see each person individually, it would just seem odd. However, the juxtaposition of all of them made them not real people, but characters. As I scanned the sidewalk, everyone looked like an extra in an early 90s low-budget movie. I could picture the AD whispering instructions to concealed earpieces for each passerby. “Keep moving! Don’t look at the camera. Don’t look at the actor! Don’t look at Chazz! He still has no idea!”

The sense that everything is slightly off, somewhat “presented”, and utterly skewed? That feeling hasn’t left me all day.

I’m either in a writerly mood or this is a narcissistic psychosis.

Not that those conditions are mutually exclusive.

Filed under: What about Chazz?, Writers, Writing exercise, , , , , ,

How do you like me now?

It occurred to me this evening that the big book I’m betting on heavily to put me on the map is…unconventional. By that I mean it’s a mongrel of a book that breaks a book full of rules. It mixes stories of horror and erotica, philosophy and thought experiments with a sprinkling of non-fiction. It’s got a marketing hook that better be strong enough to overcome the “traditional” liabilities of stories told in second-person present.

Either I’m an evil genius or an idiot, but I keep flashing on Keanu Reeves in The Matrix when  he’s about to rescue Morpheus:

Trinity: “No one’s ever done anything like this before.”

Neo: “That’s why it’s going to work.”

November 1 will be my Indie-pendance Day.

More to come.

Filed under: Books, DIY, self-publishing, What about Chazz?, Writers, writing tips, , , , , , , , ,

Bestseller with over 1,000 reviews!
Winner of the North Street Book Prize, Reader's Favorite, the
Literary Titan Award, the Hollywood Book Festival, and the
New York Book Festival.

http://mybook.to/OurZombieHours
A NEW ZOMBIE ANTHOLOGY

Winner of Writer's Digest's 2014 Honorable Mention in Self-published Ebook Awards in Genre

The first 81 lessons to get your Buffy on

More lessons to help you survive Armageddon

"You will laugh your ass off!" ~ Maxwell Cynn, author of Cybergrrl

Available now!

Fast-paced terror, new threats, more twists.

An autistic boy versus our world in free fall

Suspense to melt your face and play with your brain.

Action like a Guy Ritchie film. Funny like Woody Allen when he was funny.

Jesus: Sexier and even more addicted to love.

You can pick this ebook up for free today at this link: http://bit.ly/TheNightMan

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