UPDATE: And now it’s time to vote for
the wittiest and pithiest entries in the
The Six Words or Less Contest
Choose your favorite from the comment thread below and e-mail your first choice to expartepress AT gmail DOT com.
Voting closes August 10. Three winners will be chosen.
The grand prize winner will get in my next thriller, Higher Than Jesus. (Details below.)

Click to get Bigger Than Jesus here
I’m holding a contest that could get your name in my new thriller.
The follow-up to my crime novel, Bigger Than Jesus is called Higher Than Jesus and it’s coming this fall.
Here’s the challenge: My hit man passes a homeless person in the street and gives him some money. The homeless person wears a black hoodie. I want something catchy and memorable on that hoodie. I thought about making an inside joke and making it a Self-help for Stoners emblem (my first book). I considered using a meme that’s already out there but kind of hipster, like the inside joke from Portal: There is no cake.
But no, I’m calling on the readership! What’s the short, punchy, pithy, memorable phrase that should adorn that black hoodie on the homeless guy on a cold winter’s night in Chicago? It could be funny. It could be pointed and political. Let’s hear it!
Leave your suggestion in the comment thread.
What do you get for your contribution?
(Yes, there is metaphorical cake!)
The winner gets lots of that cake!

“You will laugh your ass off! The skill of a journalist with the flair of a stand up comedian.” ~ Author Maxwell Cyn
A. I can name a character after you in Higher Than Jesus. (No guarantees whether the character will be good or bad, alive or dead. It’s crime fiction. I don’t have many characters who are good or get to live.)
B. When I get the print edition, I’ll send you a free autographed copy wherever you are in the world.
C. I’ll gift you a copy of the kindle ebook as soon as it’s available.
D. On my podcast, I’ll mention the top three entries and the grand prize winner will be exalted. Your name and your six words or less will be talked about in glowing terms.
E. BONUS: For the overall winner with the best six words or less, I’ll promote your book, business, favorite charity, website, podcast, pet’s name, shout out or whatever on my podcast (as long as the thing you want to promote isn’t some psycho white supremacist thing. Sounds good, yes?)
Please leave your suggestions in comments. On August 1, I’ll ask for a vote for the top three, so somebody’s getting bragging rights no matter what. Let’s have some fun with this. (I have to reserve the right to not use the top phrase in case there’s a legal or editorial reason not to use it, but the grand prize winner still gets the sweet cake of A, B and C. The decision of the judge — that’s me — is final since it’s my name on the book. No purchase necessary, void where prohibited and all that crap. I can’t think of any other rules we need, but I’ll make them up if necessary. Hopefully that won’t be necessary.)
With the details out of the way, have at it! This will be fun. Submit as much as you’d like.

Check out all the books by Robert Chazz Chute here.
Impress us with freshness and originality.
Make us laugh.
Make us think.
Just, please, do it in no more than six words. Thanks!
~Robert Chazz Chute is the author of Self-help for Stoners, Bigger Than Jesus, The Dangerous Kind & Other Stories, and Sex, Death & Mind Control (for fun and profit). Learn more at the author site or see the fun Amazon bio here.
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