C h a z z W r i t e s . c o m

See all my books at AllThatChazz.com.

08/13/2010 • 2:12 AM 1

Ten Steps to be a Writer

1. Write. Most people want to write. Most don’t. Don’t be that guy.
2. Head down. Hands on keyboard.
3. Do not worry about rejection. (If you figure out how to do this, help me understand.)
4. Set a deadline. Don’t make it too far off and take it seriously.
5. Keep your work circulating. Repeat until you succeed.
6. Seek support. Eschew those who don’t support your dreams.
7. Be original. Don’t try to be the next anybody but you.
8. Read. It’s how you connect with experience beyond your own and it helps you improve your writing.
9. Don’t be a schmuck. Learn about the publishing industry so you can navigate it.
10. Don’t be a fraidy cat. Normal is for the mediocre. Dare a stab at immortality. (Did I mention you should write? I mean now!)

Filed under: publishing, Writers, writing tips, 10 tips for writers, Be a writer, writers, writing tips

08/12/2010 • 8:59 AM 0

Book Covers that Sell: 10 Crucial Elements

Your book’s cover needs:

1. A designer (99% likely.)

2. Color (usually. The Road was all black with white lettering). Not green. Green covers never sell unless the book is about golf or lawn care. (Royal blue sells better than other colors.)

3. A known author’s name. (If you’re not at all known, it would really help if you got that way. Go rob a bank or save the president or something. Get a life, and, as Zola said, “Live out loud.”

4. Failing #3, a great quote recommending the book by a known name.

5. A compelling picture. What “compelling” is, is subjective (though we do know sex sells.)

6. If not sex, violence.

7. If not violence, awe me or lure me with a (relevent) image that makes me curious.

8. A great title. A short title. (Something I can remember from the local radio interview to the bewildered bookstore clerk: Fight Club, Portnoy’s Complaint, The Dome, Calculating God, God is Not Great, The 4-Hour Work Week, White Teeth, Another Bullshit Night in Suck City.)*

9. Repeat #8 again. Kick me in the teeth with that title. (Rather than a long title to explain more, let the subtitle do that work if you must.)

10. The back cover is a cover, too. Sometimes I pick up a (usually self-published) book whose back cover is blank (and put it right back on the bookstore shelf.) That’s not clever, eye-catching or minimalist. It’s wasted advertising space. Your story blurb must be killer. Happy quotes by big reviewers/authors help if you have them.

*This is tends to be more so with fiction titles. Non-fiction titles have more latitude and tend to explicate more. Still, give me pith (as in The 4-hour Work Week example above, there’s little doubt what’s it’s about. It also happens to be a great and useful book which I just read and certainly recommend for those looking for freedom.)

Filed under: Books, publishing, writing tips, 10 Tips, blurbs, Book Covers that Sell, Sell Your Book

08/11/2010 • 8:46 AM 2

Create more interesting characters (Superman vs. Batman)

Superman and Batman. They are both orphans, but that’s pretty much where the similarity ends. Batman is the world’s greatest detective and/or a psychotic bad ass, depending on what vintage of comic you’re reading. Superman is an all-powerful boy scout with too few weaknesses. Batman is just a human who risks his secret identity every time he pulls his underwear over his Kevlar long johns.

Batman is more interesting. His story is dark so there’s more to explore. He is weak compared to Superman, but for story, you don’t want a hero who is safe from just about everything. You want a hero who is in danger every second. Then you put your characters through the grinder.

Don’t fall in love with your characters because, for your story to be at all readable, you’re going to do some horrible things to them.

Filed under: writing tips, Batman, create more interesting characters, Superman

08/10/2010 • 9:01 AM 1

Writing Tip: 3 Common Exposition Mistakes

1. Don’t let your villain explain everything to the captured hero (e.g. “I expect you to die, Mr. Bond, but first let me give you a tour of the rocket base whose deadly payloads are aimed at Topeka!”)

2. Don’t allow your exposition device to go on too long. Your hero should struggle to solve the mystery, a little at a time and with a few red herrings. If your protagonist finds the one person who knows it all–and all is explained in one big info dump—the narrative will lag and it’s a variation of deus ex machina.

3. Avoid overexplaining. Enough said.

Filed under: writing tips, common mistakes, exposition, writing tip

08/09/2010 • 8:30 AM 0

3 Cliched Openings to Avoid

1. Don’t start with your protagonist waking up in the morning.

2. Don’t start with your protagonist starting a trip.

3. Please do not start with a dream…unless you’re writing Inception 2.

Filed under: writing tips, cliches, openings to avoid, writing

08/06/2010 • 9:41 PM 0

How Not to Write a Novel: The Bookfomercial

Filed under: Books, publishing, web reviews, writing tips, book trailer, bookfomercial, How Not to Write a Novel

08/06/2010 • 12:28 PM 0

Your Computer Will Crash. Who you gonna call?

Sorry to scare you with that headline, but let’s face it, it’s going to happen. Your disk won’t last forever. At some point, system restore won’t work. Your motherboard will die and you’ll be faced with the blue screen of death. Hemingway’s wife lost his fiction on the train. You’ve got similar problems heading your way eventually. Entropy takes its price in our blood and—in the case of an author with a dead computer—tears.

How will you save your book? Where will your most precious files be? Have you printed everything out? Are you ready to find and retype all that? I didn’t think so. Me, neither.

SOLUTION 1: The cheapest backup is your own email. Label it well so you can find it again and store it on your email server. Just email it to yourself.Google allows you to do the same thing with a slightly fancier interface. When the end of your computer comes, your masterpiece will be somewhere that isn’t on your computer. That’s good, though slow retrieval file by file could be a real bitch.

SOLUTION 2: I’ve tried a dedicated external backup drive. I hate it. It’s cumbersome and the disk filled up too quickly. It was so frustrating to use it sits on my desk disconnected. The user interface sucked and it just couldn’t seem to do the job without confusing me. That’s $70 gone. (I got it on sale or I’d be $40 angrier.) If you’re a masochist, you could buy one, too.

SOLUTION 3: Carbonite. For about $55 bucks a year, this service will copy everything and, when the end comes, restore it quickly and easily. It will be as if your old computer’s ghost is resurrected on your new computer. Carbonite, I believe, is the best solution.* I signed up for the free trial once I heard about it from the Slate Culture Gabfest podcast. It works on the upload while you aren’t using your computer and its workings did not interfere with my work (unlike my TrendMicro security program! Grr!) Peace of mind is easily worth $55 a year.

*I’m not a shill for Carbonite. I’m just a believer.

And now my books, and all their many drafts, are safe.

Filed under: getting it done, web reviews, writing tips, Carbonite, restoring files, saving your book, system crash

08/05/2010 • 11:11 PM 4

What I believe about FICTION

I believe:

1. in the word, the power and the glory of its creation.

2. in the free expression of the word in all its forms.

3. free expression does the service of exposing bigots and liars.

4. censorship is for children who can’t handle all the adult input at once.

5. censors would infantilize us all if they could.

6. we speak truth to power through the power of the word so we must preserve that power.

7. words can transport us and help us transcend the ill winds of circumstance.

8. sometimes fiction is our only escape and our only hope.

9. dreamers write so that one day they can make their dreams true.

10. fiction is the lie that tells the truth.

11. books, in whatever form they take, are our chance to better ourselves because we can sift through others’ experience without suffering their lives.

12. novels measure what we believe, poetry measures what we believe about ourselves and rock and roll allows us to escape who we suspect we are. (Rock out and rock on!)

13. Fiction is pretend, but it lets us open a crack of light in the darkness so we gain an opportunity to see ourselves as characters in the story of our lives.

14. through this device of fiction, we can safely explore who we pretend to be.

15. through fiction’s device, we can get past the lies we all tell about ourselves to reach authenticity.

16. when we put pretending in its place, finally we can reach for the heroes we could be.

17. good reading can fill an afternoon.

18. great reading can fill your brain.

19. excellent reading can fill your heart and spur you to change yourself and others.

20. if I did not have words, I would paint and if I had no paints, I would sing. If I had none of these things to soothe my racing mind, I would be an evil zombie combination of Darth Vader and Dick Cheney on PCP in a Sunday school, naked and raging with automatic weapons and a Joker smile that would chill your heart.