C h a z z W r i t e s . c o m

See all my books at AllThatChazz.com.

11/11/2010 • 11:12 AM 0

#Publishing Workshops: Do we really need them anymore?

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Years ago, in an experience not unlike boot camp, I attended the Banff School of Fine Arts for a summer of The Banff Publishing Workshop. Each session was a grueling two weeks each, one for books and the other for magazines. I had the first of two panic attacks in my life there. And it changed my life in all sorts of ways.

Some nights, we didn’t sleep at all. The faculty flew in and while visiting hot shots were enjoying Banff National Park, we were slogging away making up book and magazine covers and planning publicity campaigns and pitches.

If you want the pure knowledge gained, you don’t necessarily have to do a program like this (and people are fleeing traditional publishers. Publishers are not hiring.) You may want the knowledge to inform your DIY publishing operation. There are books that help in this regard. I’d begin with the AP Stylebook for the nitpicky stuff and read the Chicago Manual of Style cover to cover for a headstart. (A surprising amount of technical and editorial stuff I learned was cleverly concealed in the Chicago Manual of Style.)

Here are the three things Banff did for me (and how technology has changed everything):

1. Credibility. I was one of a few who went through the program and one of a very small number who graduated from both books and magazines. (They called us Lifers.) When I went back to Toronto with that on my resume, employers knew I was serious.

It’s much less important now to appeal to authority. Start asserting your authority through the power of your knowledge base and your actions. You can publish a cool book or a graphic novel or make a film without Daddy. You don’t have to ask anyone else’s permission now. (Just do it was a much better slogan for Nike than…whatever it is now.)

2. Contacts. Friends, professional and non-collegial, were really important at that time and a network of people are just as important as ever, but now for some different reasons. (And now you call many of them you tweeps.)

Then it was about getting a job. Now it’s about knowing people to reach out to who have information you need and who are willing to assist you. If you start up your own publishing company, you don’t have to work so hard at connecting with people. If you get out there, you’ll soon find they are coming to you. Technology makes for an entirely different narrative to your work.

3. Personal transformation. This one aspect made the entire experience of Banff worthwhile because somehow, in just four weeks, I got back something four years of journalism school pounded out of me: a sense of humour.

I used to be angry all the time. I preferred people to fear me because I mistook that for respect. I wasn’t friendly and open because I was too afraid of criticism. When you’re a hater, you think everyone else is, too. In Banff, I bounced back from the panic attack in spades with a magazine presentation and reading that blew everyone away. I learned to let go and, when I relaxed, I found I could make people laugh and I didn’t have to act like a tough guy anymore. (Testosterone poisoning is insulting, but maybe it’s appropriate in this case.) Maybe you don’t need to improve yourself like I did. Or you can achieve the same results in a yoga class or years of therapy. I don’t know. I can only say, whether you’re writing alone in a basement or out there in the cold slogging, seek out new experiences and maybe some of them will be transformative. (See post: 10 Lessons Learned from An Evening with Kevin Smith.)

Addendum: This year at a writing conference, the (now defunct) Banff Publishing Workshop came up over lunch. An old and well-respected editor who made her name at Penguin muttered that, in her day, she didn’t need to attend any such program. She achieved her status through just doing the work. Yeah. Kind of bitchy.

However, maybe the circle is now complete. Maybe you don’t need to go to some fancy publishing program and pay a whack of money for the privilege of sleepless nights and nasty remarks from visiting know-it-alls. It seems the old editor’s time has come again and, as I’ve described, the ticket to the show is simply to get up from your seat and climb on stage. In a world where we’re all authors, publishers, editors and poets, now you can.

Our first Canadian National Park – Banff National Park of Canada, Canada (travelpod.com)
Types of Travellers – Banff National Park, Canada (travelpod.com)
Banff Town (tokelosheblog.wordpress.com)
Beautiful Banff – Banff National Park, Alberta, Canada (travelpod.com)
Banff and Yoho mountain parks may add access for thrill seekers (calgaryherald.com)

Filed under: Books, DIY, Writing Conferences, AP Stylebook, Banff Centre, Banff National Park, Banff Publishing Workshop, Chicago Manual of Style, publish yourself, publishing

11/10/2010 • 11:05 AM 0

#Editors, Readers and Critics

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Earlier this week in this space I contributed to the Internet shredding of a thieving editor (see below) so it’s time to balance things out with a happy story.

About My Editor: Last night someone asked me what my relationship with my magazine editor is like.

The short answer is, “Terrific.” The long answer is that we joke around. A lot. We have a lot of fun and have rarely disagreed. We are reasonable people. We’ve never met in person though we plan to some day (and almost made that work this summer.) We talk about projects on the phone on occasion, but mostly we email back and forth. We’re both incredibly busy people, so emails allow me to say something funny without intruding too much on her crazy schedule.

Of course, we have disagreed. Most of the time (98 percent of the time, not 51 percent) I figure out immediately or soon after that she was right. She’s held me back from saying a few things that, on sober second thought, were kind of out there. When I’ve stuck to my guns and presented a cogent argument, she has capitulated. A good editor is always trying to make the writing better (and occasionally has to protect the writer from himself.) As with dealing with any great person, when we’re finished talking or writing back and forth, I feel valued.

About My Readers:

I have two beta readers. The first is my wife. She has graded so many students during her time in academia, she’s the one with a sharp eye for my typos (many) and my obfuscations (less of those, I hope. Maybe. I dunno…) She’ll notice a construction that seems awkward, but she’s gentle about it.

The second reader is my oldest friend. He used to work in publishing and has edited a literary journal. Best of all, he’s a writer at heart. He is invaluable for broader editorial suggestions when my idea is almost there but not quite at the destination at which it will finally arrive in the last draft. He can be my biggest fan and, depending on his mood and my subject, my harshest critic.

When I wrote a short story that included a gay protagonist in a military environment, he disagreed with my take vehemently. I ignored him on that one and I thought the story fell apart for other reasons so I never tried to publish it and it’s tucked away on a thumb drive.

On another occasion I wrote a humour piece for a magazine. He’s funny. I’m funny. What could go wrong? He broke it down for me in detail and ended with this bon mot: “For a humour piece, it’s not all that funny.”

Thud!

I picked myself up off the floor and took another run at it, made the humour more relevant and hit the piece out of the park. I took his criticism to heart and the next draft was so very much better for it. He’s got a great perspective on publishing and I usually end up considering about 60 to 70 percent of his suggestions.

I do not send everything I write through my readers first. Most of my magazine writing is of a kind that I don’t feel I need the extra feedback and it’s all between my editor and me. (She also has a light touch on my copy and I like that she works with me and consults on every change.)

If it’s fiction—especially long fiction—it goes through my beta readers.

When I develop marketing materials or write speeches, only the principles are involved. With short pieces, it’s easier to keep a handle on what’s to be achieved, anyway. Occasionally, with proprietary information, it wouldn’t be appropriate to bring in an outside reader. Also, if you work in a variety of niches as I do, it’s not fair to your beta readers to expect them to have an opinion on something outside their interests.

About Critics:

There are the kind of critiques you ask for. You get those opinions from people you trust, the ones with whom you have a history.

There are the kind of critiques that come at you. Sometimes those criticisms are thoughtful, have substance and bring up a new angle or experience. I love it when I pose a question in a piece and people come forward with interesting ideas and possible solutions. (That’s happening now with a column I wrote. We’re getting a lot of kind letters from people anxious to share their view on a question I posed.)

Occasionally, you get somebody who seems cranky and has an axe to grind. I find this type of critic tends to have their say about what they want to say and if it seems they didn’t really read what was written…well, they didn’t. They just want to be heard and recognized. That’s okay. Everyone gets to have an opinion.

But you don’t have to take everyone’s opinion so seriously. You get to choose who matters to you most and who you’ll go back to the next time you need a fresh set of eyes on your draft.

And you as the author? You get the final say on what appears under your name.

The Sorry State of the Rejection Letter (themillions.com)
If You Are A Writer When You SHOULD Contact The Editor (ronmedlin.com)
Knopf Editor Makes Great Case for Editors in Poorly Written Post About Needing Editors [Fuckups] (gawker.com)
Write that novel or not, but treat readers right (shannonturlington.com)
Submitting Experimental Fiction to Magazines (teachstreet.com)
Harper’s Magazine Names Zadie Smith as New Books Columnist (eon.businesswire.com)
Salon Names New Editor (mediadecoder.blogs.nytimes.com)
4 Insights for Novelists (and One So-So Tip) (psychologytoday.com)

Filed under: Editing, Editors, publishing, Writers, writing tips, critics, editing, my editor, my readers, publishing, short story, writer, writing

11/09/2010 • 10:35 AM 1

#Publishing Links: Bad News for Publishers

I attended a writers’ conference where a keynote speaker criticized a former publisher. The publisher was small, and Canadian, and there had been a dispute over the author’s electronic rights (though the publisher wasn’t selling any digital versions of the author’s work anyway.) That’s when things got ugly. “Small publishers aren’t interested in selling books. They make their money with government grants.” He walked back from that statement and mentioned several small presses he revered, but he had reason for his venom. He bought the rights back at great expense so he could use them properly.

It is true that if you’re a small Canadian publisher, you’re eligible for grants. The big publishers have some margin for error in their budgets. The mid-sized publishers are walking a financial tightrope. That’s the general point of a recent Globe & Mail article on the dangers waters publishers sail. It’s worth reading when you’re trying to choose whom you should send your precious manuscript.

In other news, if you check yesterday’s comments, you’ll see Sue Kenney, author of My Camino, stopped by for a comment about how she wrote fast to fit her publisher’s schedule. (Thanks for commenting , Sue! Check out her site and her wonderful story at www.suekenney.ca.) I mentioned in my reply how many traditional publishers are losing book sales because they don’t have the electronic version available and people are looking for those titles. When you don’t find the titles you want, you buy a book that is available for your iPad.

How do I know this? Because I’ve visited this link: Lost Book Sales | Every day an author and a publisher lose a sale. These are the stories why.‏ Publishers? If you haven’t embarked on your e-book program yet, you don’t have much time left to make the switch before you are irrelevant. (Yes, JK Rowling is the exception. She’s refusing to allow Harry Potter to go digital. Good for her. However, her amazing success is atypical in the industry and shouldn’t be the basis for sales decisions about the rest of the market.)

As if that weren’t enough to make a publisher knock out a window and crawl out on a ledge, I ran across this post on the wave of piracy that’s coming to my favorite industry: Your time is up, publishers. Book piracy is about to arrive on a massive scale – Telegraph Blogs – The BFF‏.

Don’t worry though, friends!

This isn’t a wake.

It’s just a call to make the choice to adapt.

It’s a hope the industry is willing to change.

Happy Tuesday! I’m off to NanoWriMo.

E-Books Are a Billion Dollar Market (slog.thestranger.com)
How to Promote Your Ebook (suzanneanderson.net)
Mike Shatzkin discusses e-book territorial restrictions (teleread.com)
Publishers Fear eBook Piracy, But Shouldn’t (torrentfreak.com)
Google Editions, Bookstore in the Cloud, Will Go Live By July (libraryjournal.com)
So You Want to Self-Publish? (suzanneanderson.net)
James bond novels go digital, cutting out Penguin (telegraph.co.uk)
The Seven Secrets to Ebook Publishing Success (smashwords.com)
Ian Fleming’s James Bond E-Books: Bypassing the Print Publisher (dailyfinance.com)
Amazon Introduces 70% Revenue Share For Kindle Magazine And Newspaper Publishers (techcrunch.com)

Filed under: links, Media, publishing, self-publishing, books, Globe & Mail, publishers, publishing, Publishing and Printing

11/08/2010 • 10:35 AM 5

#NaNoWriMo: Five Advantages of Fast Writing

Traditional wisdom is that it takes a lot of time and energy to write a book. That’s generally true. However, that counts the entire process. It takes a long time to revise, edit and hone a book until you feel you’re ready to let it go. That doesn’t mean you can’t write a first draft quickly. Some purists will protest that haste will decrease the quality of a writer’s work in favour of quantity. Sure. I have a different take on that objection. Assume your first draft is going to suck anyway. Since you’re best writing is rewriting, it’s best to have something to revise. For many writers, if they didn’t write the first draft in haste, they might not have anything to revise at all. You can’t edit a blank page.

So here’s my contrarian view on why fast writing can be a very good thing:

1. You maintain your enthusiasm for the project because you get the first draft done quickly. Marathon writing takes endurance. A sprint can be advantageous, especially if you haven’t completed a manuscript in the past and you’re developing those muscles.

2. When you write in haste, you can see the whole project’s development at once. You’re less likely to drop threads when you get the first draft done in a short time. If you’ve read Under the Dome by Stephen King—a huge and heavy book of great length which, in general, I enjoyed—maybe you noticed that he seemed to have a supernatural element on the protagonist’s side that is never explained and soon forgotten. It took him three years or so to write it. That might be why something’s amiss.

3. Increased productivity primes your art pump. If you produce a lot, you tend to produce more the rest of the time, too. It’s the literary equivalent of, if you want the job done, give it to a busy person. Artists need to get into the habit of production and treat their work as a business and a craft (instead of something that can only produced when the planets align and you have a handy vial of unicorn blood to consecrate your art-making ceremony.)

4. Increased production equals more money in the long run. That’s not mercenary. That’s math. If you can produce four books (and sell them) in the time it takes someone else to write one, you’re ahead (unless the other guy is William Styron, but he’d be ahead in any case…and he’s dead.)

5. You may not sell everything you write. In fact, if you’ve got an agent, an editor and a publisher between you and the market, there’s an excellent chance someone will stand up at some point and say, this isn’t ready for your customers. (They may or may not be right about that. When Robert Munsch‘s publisher told him the world wasn’t ready for Love You Forever, he took that controversial children’s book elsewhere. And had a hit.)

My point is, if you spend ten years writing a book and it does not sell, you will be sad. If you have other books to sell, the one disappointment won’t sting so much. You know how every second Star Trek movie was great and the others suck? It evens out when you have more out there.

If I sound like I’m blaming, shaming and pointing fingers, I apologize. I have been guilty of acting like a dilettante about my fiction. I’ve had to gather unicorn blood before I could summon the muse. That’s changed recently as I’ve reevaluated. I’m motivated now to go into heavy production and get to work on the revisions for my books and, as Seth Godin puts it, “Ship!” (Also, see the post below on Lessons Received from An Evening with Kevin Smith for the whys and wherefores. )

My book production won’t happen overnight. But it will happen faster than it was happening. Boo-ya!

Seek Library Write-In Support: NaNoWriMo Tip #6 (mediabistro.com)
Simplifying NaNoWriMo (and Other Writing) (simpleproductivityblog.com)
“Sunday Salon: Writers, readers, and NaNoWriMo” and related posts (3rsblog.com)
Use a Name Generator: NaNoWriMo Tip #5 (mediabistro.com)
NaNoWriMo Tip #7: Consult Role Playing Game Plots (mediabistro.com)
Better yet, DON’T write that novel (salon.com)
Bio Break salutes NaNoWriMo writers! (biobreak.wordpress.com)

Filed under: NanNoWriMo, writing tips, NaNoWriMo, National Novel Writing Month, seth godin, Stephen King, William Styron, write fast, writers, writing fast

11/06/2010 • 9:23 PM 6

The Net is NOT Public Domain

By now you’ve heard about the Cooks Source controversy. Actually, it’s not much of a controversy. The editor of Cooks Source used a writer’s work without payment or attribution. She made things worse by telling the writer she should be grateful for the free edit and generally being ignorant and nasty about it. Then the weight of the world crashed down upon said editor as the internet descended upon her for her arrogant plagiarism. Now it’s been reported other stories were plagiarized from sources with deep pockets and lawyers (like Martha Stewart.) Things are getting worse for the editor, who seems to be socially tone deaf in her responses to the complaints. Through repetition, by every english-speaking writer on the planet, I’m sure it shall be clear to her eventually.

The thing about the web is, it’s dead easy to find out when someone takes your work. (I’ve caught a few people taking my work already. It’s not a compliment. Fortunately, when the offenders were contacted, they were apologetic (and more clueless than malicious so it worked out fine.)

I don’t have much to add to the outcry. (If you didn’t have wi-fi in your cave, there are plenty of links below the video to show you what you missed.) I found Nemspy’s video through the incomparable Neil Gaiman. Enjoy!

Breathtaking editorial arrogance (scienceblogs.com)
Cooking Magazine Gets Poached Egg on the Face (blogs.forbes.com)
World’s Dumbest Editor Incurs The Wrath Of The Internet (woot.com)
U.S. cooking magazine under fire for lifting article (theprovince.com)
Print editor tells web writer her work is “public domain,” suggests victim should pay for editing of stolen piece (inquisitr.com)
Attention: The Web Is Not Public Domain [Internet] (gizmodo.com)
Today’s web justice driveby: Cooks Source Magazine (boingboing.net)
Plagiarizing print editor claims the entire Internet is “public domain” (geek.com)
Magazine Steals Articles, Claims the Internet Is Public Domain (slog.thestranger.com)
Cook’s Source: When The Source is Plagiarized, The Source Should Feel Grateful – and Guilty (smartbitchestrashybooks.com)
Why Would Cooks Source Magazine Steal Content? (chris.pirillo.com)
Judith Griggs: The Google Is Our Friend, Not Hers (smartbitchestrashybooks.com)
Cooks Source: US copyright complaint sparks Twitter and Facebook storm (guardian.co.uk)
Web Shames Magazine for Plagiarizing Blogger’s Article (mashable.com)
Blogger victim of infringement wins support (cbc.ca)
The Day The Internet Threw A Righteous Hissyfit About Copyright And Pie (npr.org)
Food magazine gets roasted online over copyright claim (cnn.com)
Cooks Source editor kicks Net hornet’s nest (technolog.msnbc.msn.com)

Filed under: Rant, Unintentionally hilarious, Cooks source, editing, editors, plagiarism, Public domain

11/05/2010 • 2:15 PM 1

CanWrite! 2011 Conference Announcement

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In 2011, the Canadian Authors Association has announced CanWrite! 2011

will be held in Grand Bend, Ontario, May 2-8!

For more information on the conference/writer’s retreat, here’s the link.

If you’re a writer, please consider attending. I attended the CanWrite! Conference in Victoria, British Columbia last summer. I learned so much there. I took in workshops, had my eyes opened to the future of book publishing and best of all, met a lot of really cool writers. (I even got to do a live reading of one of my short stories.)

Writing is a lonely profession. It’s fun and useful to connect and recharge. This year, CanWrite will operate like a writers’ retreat so yes, you can get stuff done!

(Thanks to my friend Kim for the heads-up.)

Indie Revolution Update: The 2011 San Francisco Writers Conference “Goes Indie” (prweb.com)
How To Write and Publish A Book For The First Time – For Teachers (brighthub.com)

Filed under: publishing, self-publishing, Useful writing links, Writing Conferences, Canwrite Conference, publishing, Writers Resources, writers retreat, writing conference

11/05/2010 • 10:31 AM 3

Censorship: American Psycho, Canadian Psychos

Support censorship: Botticelli's "Birth o...

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God so loved the world he sent his only Son…instead of a committee.

For a couple of years I sat on a committee for Freedom of Expression representing editors and publishers.

Here’s what I learned:

Many people are staunch defenders of free expression as long as they agree with the views expressed.

I say I “sat” on the committee because my impression was that nothing would ever get done. The one time I chaired the committee, I was criticized for being too controversial.

Flash forward: I was no longer on the committee and was now working for Cannon Book Distributors. Brett Easton Ellis‘s American Psycho had been out for a short time and I was selling it across Canada. I met a former employer with whom I’d locked horns before in a Toronto street. He looked smug; he had no other facial expression, actually. He thought he had me.

“Now how do you feel about having to sell American Psycho?” (He didn’t say “ha-HA!” but the unspoken hung in the air between us.)

“Great,” I said. “I let grown-ups decide what they read. Otherwise, I’d be treating them like children.”

“You’re a civil libertarian, then?” he asked. He asked the question the same way you might ask an acquaintance how often he buggered syphilitic goats.

“Yes.”

He shook his head. No hope for me.

Here’s what censors don’t seem to get: Either you read a book you found offensive and decided for yourself it wasn’t for you (in which case everyone else should have that same privilege) or you didn’t read it, in which case you shouldn’t condemn it. I’ve already got two parents. I really don’t need more authority figures telling me what not to read.

I love a list of censored books.

Almost invariably, that’s where to find great, or at least interesting, books.

Book Talk: Bret Easton Ellis on the lottery of success (reuters.com)
American Psycho To Slay Audiences In Front of the Footlights [The Theatre] (gawker.com)
28 reviews of American Psycho (rateitall.com)
Bret Easton Ellis (jimdempsey.wordpress.com)

Filed under: banning books, censors, American Psycho, Bret Easton Ellis, censors, censorship

11/05/2010 • 9:47 AM 2

Kevin Smith loved the blog post! The aftermath…

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Good morning! First off, big thanks to Kevin Smith for the bump love and encouragement. He liked yesterday’s post, twittered it to his followers and within 20 minutes my blog got 500 hits. A couple of hours later? Seven-hundred and climbing. Kevin has a huge following and every morning he must wake up, blaze up and say, “It’s good to be the king.” Because it is and he’s earned it.

Thanks, too, to all the kind tweeple who sent me such nice feedback on the blog post and shared their feelings about the event. I wasn’t the only one so impressed with the experience. I received several tweets from people from Kitchener and area who were equally effected. We went for the laughs. We got much more than we expected. I know he must inspire tons of people because, of all the feedback I got, people were kind and there wasn’t even a hater in the bunch.

I’m earnest about earning my piece, too. An Evening with Kevin Smith really was an eye-opener and course correction for me and I’m already working away on that. (I hope some of you stick around or swing by once in a while to see my progress.) I have books to write and books to edit and I’m going into overdrive to get them edited, out the door and into the marketplace.

Great people make you feel like you can be great, too. Someone famous said something like that. Kevin exemplifies it. Thanks again, sir!

Okay, a little later today, I’ve got a story about American Psycho and me wrestling with censors…who, strangely, didn’t think they were censors.

Also, some ace writing and publishing links will be posted this afternoon.

Finally, a National Novel Writing Month update will be posted this evening.

Are you making progress? That’s what it’s all about.

‘Red State’ teaser poster: Is this Kevin Smith’s comeback? (popwatch.ew.com)
Kevin Smith Teaser Poster for Red State (screenhead.com)
Kevin Smith’s Red State Is Finished, Already Has A Teaser Poster (cinemablend.com)
“Kevin Smith Wants to Screen Red State at Sundance Film Festival” and related posts (shockya.com)

Filed under: blogs & blogging, getting it done, web reviews, An Evening with Kevin Smith, Kevin Smith

11/04/2010 • 4:24 PM 8

10 Lessons Learned from An Evening with Kevin Smith

Director/Actor Kevin Smith at the 2008 Comic-C...

Image via Wikipedia

(Sorry for the late post today, folks! Up till 3 a.m. last night, head buzzing with ideas.)

Last night I spent an evening with Kevin Smith. Well, me and hundreds of others. He’s written and/or directed 10 films, authored several books and comics and rocks the mic on several podcasts from his own theatre, Smodcastle. The Q&A lasted almost four hours. When he was done, I felt like I wasn’t doing enough with my life. Not by half. Here’s a few things I learned (or was reminded):

1. Be inspiring through your actions. His prayer before each performance is, “Be honest and it will be okay.” Also, be inspired. (Kevin found inspiration in George Carlin when he was 12, hired the great comedian when he became a filmmaker and later Smith took the stage himself.)

2. Be kind and generous. Kevin has been generous, sometimes to a fault. The podcasts are free and his childhood friend, Jason Mewes, is off heroin, in part because of Kevin.

3. Be funny. Loosen up. You should probably do more weed, too. Smith didn’t start smoking pot until he was 38. (Also It’s okay to pander to the hometown crowd as long as you do so ironically.)

4. “Don’t chase the puck. Go where the puck is going to be.” (Kevin loves the Gretzkys, Walter and Wayne.) Any writer can see the application to publishing. Mr. Smith is the DIY indie flick king considering he funded his first film with a stack of credit cards. Going DIY makes sense for writers, now more than ever. See the video link just below this one for more on that.

5. Use the whole stage. Kevin Smith‘s a big guy, but he shows so much energy. He not only has stage presence, you’ll be convinced he’s thinner than you thought and glowing under the lights (like the post-mortem Yoda and Jedi, though that could have been the bright stage lights.) I’ve lost a lot of weight recently, but I think I need to live louder and larger.

6. The work you do now prepares you for the work you do later. (For example, if I hadn’t written a particular short story a couple months ago, I would have been without a paddle when I got to NaNoWriMo Creek. See the post on The Back-up Plan and the Hyponogogic State for more on that.)

7. Don’t give the critics so much credit, especially when they make you feel bad about yourself or decrease art’s productivity.

8. Develop your craft and work on your dream. Kevin’s obviously very familiar with Malcolm Gladwell‘s reportage on how it takes 10,000 hours of practice to become a master. I haven’t worked hard enough on my dream. I’ve let distractions and other missions get in the way. I can’t do that anymore.

9. Make friends. Kevin Smith is surrounded by close friends from childhood, but he’s one of those gregarious guys who connects with people easily. (I’m working on that, too. For more on that, see the post about my friend Peter, the Master of the Instant Connection.

10. Be as happy as you are smart.

That last one requires a little more discussion on my part, if only so I can make it clearer to myself. I listen to Kevin Smith at least twice a week and sometimes more depending on what podcasts he’s on. I thought I knew his voice so well, but I was unprepared for the effect of seeing him in person. I thought he’d be more cynical. Instead, we had so much fun because he had so much fun.

And here’s where the experience made me uncomfortably self-aware. I realized that I have often equated intelligence with unhappiness (and therefore happy equals dumb.) This summer I remember making a joke about hearing Journey’s Can’t Stop Believing. “For a moment,” I wrote, “I’m an optimistic idiot, too!” Okay, I still think that’s kind of funny, but the subtext is sad, isn’t it? Being and acting more positive costs nothing and would benefit me greatly.

Thanks for the reminder, sir. As a neurotic Jack Nicholson says to Helen Hunt in As Good As It Gets, “You make me want to be a better man.” He warned us not to meet our heroes, but I sure wasn’t disappointed in mine.